Broken

I told myself as I grabbed my laptop to write this that I would hate myself in the morning.  8 AM’s everyday were unfortunately a have-to this semester, and my plan was to be in bed by 10:00 tonight.  I was, actually, until I looked at the clock.  It was 10:28, and I was far from asleep.

An early night-in turned into a brick of anxiety hitting me.  I don’t think it should come as a shock that anxiety is a struggle of mine because a lot of people tend to have it for various reasons.  I used to think it wasn’t a commonality, but it turns out the Enemy is quite fond of utilizing anxiety as a tool for distraction.

So, I sat up in bed and tried to think of something I could busy myself with to push the anxiety to the back of my mind.  Word of advice, this is not wise and in no way helps. 

About that time, I got a text from a dear friend from this past summer.  With my eyes swollen from tears, I asked her if we could read scripture together over the phone.  When she said yes, I immediately sent a warning of the mess I currently looked like.

After reading some scripture and my friend saying a prayer, the phone call ended with her giving me specific instructions to get some sleep.  I had all intentions to, really, I did.  But as I sat at a pretty low point, God graciously revealed to me His use of brokenness.

All throughout scripture, you can see where the writers wrote out of their own brokenness.  God used them in their brokenness to write the words we read from our Bibles, and just look at how He still uses scripture today.  Years and years later, broken people who the Lord used are still being read and talked about.  Why?

God specializes in brokenness.  He defeated brokenness.  That’s why He can use brokenness – He defeated it at the cross.

Maybe you are currently sitting in anxiety, doubt, or fear.  All of those cause brokenness, but the amazing thing about it all is that the Lord can still use the brokenness to reveal His glory.  What could compare to the glory of the Lord?  Even more, what could compare to God revealing His glory in the midst of our brokenness?

So, odds are, I will continue to struggle with anxiety.  I am a broken individual, and anxiety happens to be one of my shattered pieces.

Plot twist: Shattered pieces can be Saved pieces.

Saved, and saved by the Lord to use.